review: starfish

 

Title: Starfish

Author: Akemi Dawn Bowman

Genre: Young Adult, Contemporary

Rating: 5 stars

Synopsis:

Kiko Himura has always had a hard time saying exactly what she’s thinking. With a mother who makes her feel unremarkable and a half-Japanese heritage she doesn’t quite understand, Kiko prefers to keep her head down, certain that once she makes it into her dream art school, Prism, her real life will begin.

But then Kiko doesn’t get into Prism, at the same time as her abusive uncle moves back in with her family. So when she receives an invitation from her childhood friend to leave her small town and tour art schools on the West Coast, Kiko jumps at the opportunity in spite of the anxieties and fears that attempt to hold her back. And now that she is finally free to be her own person outside the constricting walls of her home life, Kiko learns transformative truths about herself, her past, and how to be brave.

A luminous, heartbreaking story of identity, family, and the beauty that emerges when we embrace our true selves.

Source: Goodreads 

It's a big deal when I make the effort to turn on my laptop to write a review. I used to write proper reviews all the time back in the day, but I haven't done this in like, two years because I'm just lazy now lol but this book was just too good, i NEED to type out my thoughts properly for this one. I want to start by explaining the reason I decided to read Starfish. So i was googling for YA books that dealt with social anxiety because I've been struggling with that lately and thought reading novels about it may help, and this site recommended it alongside a review by Hanna Alkaf, the Malaysian author who wrote the amazing YA historical fiction The Weight of Our Sky. I immediately looked up Starfish on Goodreads, saw a very decent rating and glimpsed through the first few reviews and i was sold. I bought it immediately on Kindle. Best e-book purchase EVER. The Writing I can't even begin to express how much i appreciate the writing. Sure, the writing wasn't exactly lyrical, but that didn't matter at all. To me, it was poetic. I made so many highlights throughout the book because I resonated with so many things the author wrote. I especially relate so much to Kiko's thoughts, sometimes I felt like Kiko was ME or that i ghostwrited her monologues lol. I deeply appreciated the way Akemi Dawn Bowman wrote about Kiko's experience with anxiety, particularly with social anxiety. I don't think I relate to all of Kiko's actions in response to the anxiety she feels, but I most definitely relate to her feelings and thoughts of it, if that makes sense. The author also includes some very important topics (i also consider these as trigger warnings) such as emotional abuse, sexual abuse, racism and suicide attempt. However, I don't feel like these themes stood out that obviously– they were quite subtle in my opinion, and I really liked that they were. The Characters Having finished the book, I'm actually really shocked at just how similar Kiko's life resembles mine??? I really like Kiko. Even if there may be times when I get frustrated with how she handles things, I GET why she does it, and I know if I were actually in her shoes I'd be doing the same thing too. I like Kiko's siblings, they remind me so much of my own. The relationship between Kiko and her siblings closely mirror my own relationship with mine. I absolutely hate her mum, oh my god. But I really do empathise with Kiko and her constant desire to want to impress her mum, to get any signal from her own mother that she loves Kiko. I didn't have a good relationship with my mum during my teen years (it's gotten soo much better now) so i understand what that can be like. But damn, Kiko's mum is a hundred times worse than what I've experienced. I'm sorry I keep talking about ways I relate to this book, I can't help it. It's the reason why it's so special to me. Anyway, I also need to mention Jamie. I like him a lot!! And Hiroshi!!! And Hiroshi's family!! AND THE ROMANCE!!! There's not a lot of it BUT I LIKE IT A LOT!! I really loved going on this journey with Kiko. I really wanted to read a book with the MC experiencing social anxiety because I hoped to feel inspired by their journey in growing from their fears and finding that their courage can lead them to amazing opportunities and people. And I got that from Starfish. It's been a while since i last found an author who makes me want to read everything they've written, but Akemi Dawn Bowman, you officially have a new fan. Starfish is now one of my favourite books of all time.